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.He wanted to look at Trent, or talk to him, but he was afraid to.From behind him, Gene Blume's sneering voice interrupted his thoughts."Guess you'll be glad to be getting back to the city,huh? We all know you would never have made it to camp if it wasn't for Trent." Under his breath, Gene muttered, "You littlefag."Clay stiffened but didn't turn.He could feel Trent fuming next to him.He put a hand on Trent's arm to stop him from sayinganything.People like the Blumes weren't worth their time.Confronting them wouldn't change anything.They would still benarrow-minded bigots.Trent must not have agreed.To Clay's shock, he turned to face the Blumes.Clay turned, too, worried about what Trent wouldsay, but when he spoke, his voice was calm."Fuck you, Gene.Clay suggested the shortcut that helped us beat you, and heeven insisted we stop when I hurt my ankle.We would have beaten you by another day if he hadn't." Trent smiled and lacedhis fingers through Clay's."You got your ass kicked by a couple of fags.What does that say about you?"Gene stared at Trent, his mouth open."You.you're."Clay was too busy being astonished at Trent's actions to relish the reaction.He stared down at Trent's hand.A couple of fags.Trent didn't bother to answer.He turned back to face the front of the van, fingers still cradling Clay's.He held on all the wayto the airport.Clay clutched Trent's hand in silence, torn between shock, elation, and confusion.* * * *Clay didn't break down until his plane was in the air.For once he was grateful for the aisle seat.He slipped out of his seat beltthe second the fasten seat belt light went out, locked himself in the tiny airplane bathroom, and let the tears come.For fiveminutes, silent tears streamed down his cheeks.He'd never been one to worry if crying was "too girly," and he wasn't about tostart now.After five minutes, he pulled himself together and washed his face.Time to suck it up and put on a happy face.Theemotional release had helped a little, but now he felt drained and empty.He curled up in his seat and tried to sleep.* * * *Back at Lambert Airport, Clay shouldered his backpack and made his way to the pickup zone.He spotted Rex right away.His brother leaned up against his truck, reading a magazine.To his horror, Clay felt tears prickling the back of his eyes again.He stopped for a second to blink them back, not wanting to cry in front of Rex.His brother would freak out.His pause must have caught Rex's attention, because his brother stood up straight and strode toward him."Hey! How wasyour trip?"Clay accepted the hug Rex offered gratefully.Against his brother's big shoulder, he muttered, "Good."Rex leaned back and put Clay away from him, his face creasing into a fierce frown."Clay.You didn't."Clay knew exactly what his brother meant.He had the worst habit of getting hurt at every turn.Rex understood him likenobody else did.Unwilling to lie, he shrugged."Shit, bro, you were on a wilderness adventure.How the hell did you find a guy at a place like that?" The expression onRex's face was somewhere between exasperation and fondness."Just lucky, I guess.Or unlucky." Clay shrugged again."Let's talk about this later, okay? For now, I just want to go home."Rex's gaze said you're not getting out of telling me forever, buddy, but he nodded."Hop in."Clay sighed and obeyed.It was time to get back to his normal life.And this time, he was living it on his terms.* * * *Clay's first order of business was to dye his hair back to the way he liked it.Dante, his favorite stylist, was thrilled to see him,and together they decided on dark, chocolate brown with bright red streaks.The base color was a bit more restrained than hisusual raven black, and the finished product resembled a wilder version of his natural color, but he liked the way the colorslooked with his skin tone.He went back to his usual routine right away.Work helped keep his mind off his loneliness.Nights and weekends he filledwith friends and spending time with Rex and Ellie.For once, he didn't try to find a new guy right away.His bruised heartwasn't ready.When he went to clubs, he let his friends do all the picking up.He restricted himself to drinks, dancing, and alittle harmless flirting--and he wore whatever the hell he wanted to, fem or not.Overall, his plan to take his life back seemed to be working.Then, on a boring Friday afternoon at work, a few weeks after hereturned, he got an email from "Jonathan T.Raines." He almost deleted the message unread, until he remembered that Trent'sname was actually Jonathan.Clay's finger hovered over the mouse button for several minutes while he considered his options.He was finally starting toget over Trent.He thought.Would opening the email send him back to square one? And what if it was nothing more than astupid forward, or something equally lame, and he was getting all worked up for no good reason?Finally he told himself to stop being a dumbass and make a decision.He clicked on the message.The short missive left himconfused.Hey, Clay,I hope you remembered Jonathan was me.Just wondered how you were now that we're both back in civilization.I'm back atwork, desk duty for now.It sucks.How's everything with you?TrentOn one hand, Trent had reached out to him.That was more than Clay had expected.On the other hand, the email was aboutas generic as it got.There was no mention of anything personal.Clay chewed his lip and considered his reply.Trent,Hey, good to hear from you.I'm glad you're back at work, even if it's boring old desk duty.I'm sure you'll be out therecatching bad guys again soon enough.As for me, I'm back to my normal life."Fem" and all.And you know what? I love it.CThat ought to do the trick of reminding Trent who he was in case the man had gotten nostalgic and forgetful since theyparted.Clay hit send and shut down his computer, ready to relax.His phone pinged the signal for new email before he even got home.He made himself wait until he got inside his condobefore opening it.Good for you.You shouldn't have to change who you are.Just realized I've never seen this so-called "fem" version of you.Before he gave himself time to think about what he was doing, Clay had taken a picture of himself on his phone, bright hair,wry smile, preppy-argyle-sweater-over-collared-shirt, and all.He attached the picture to an email and sent it [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]